Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Zero-for-4, or About Average, Yet...Success!

You remember Three's Company, the 70s/80s sitcom, and how it was such a huge scandal for one of them to have made two dates for the same time? (At which point hilarity ensued.) Well, Corpus is like that, only without the comedy. This town is all flake, all the time. I've made as many as 3 dates, without cancelling any of them, only to have them all fail and resort to a back up plan. Tonight wasn't that bad, but interesting nonetheless.

Had tentative plans to tonight with Xelena, a stripper from The Palace. Got her new digits Sun night. Called her this afternoon, and got the message "This subscribers phone is temporarily out of service." Hasn't paid her cell phone bill. Dammit! And a call later confirmed she wasn't working tonight. For those without sufficient experience, no, this wasn't a fake number. Girls in the "Real World" give out fake digits in order to 1) get you to go away, or 2) out of some sense of "being polite", etc. Strippers don't, if they don't want to give them up, they just tell you to come back into the club next time they're working. Now, their actual intentions may be a different story ;).

The upside of this was that it obviated the question of 'Where do I take an underage girl out on a Tuesday night?' Also, I have "duty" tomorrow, which is a severe inconvenience. I have to be at work at 0730 Wed. and Thurs to pick-up and drop off the "duty phone". And lock up the building at 7pm tomorrow night. And stay sober.

But I had a good nap, so time for backup plans:

-Tosha: lives nearby, solid 3.9, bonus points for an incredible rack. Haven't really dated her yet, but trying. She's a bartender, works Wed-Sat, so thought this might be possible. Didn't answer.

-Julie: worthy of a story on here, but a nice girl and easy lay. Also no answer. Got points for trying ;).

-Erin: still trying for date #2, tentative for tomorrow night. We'll see...

-Sarah The Stripper: AWOL. Figure she's in another town raising cash, possibly without her cell phone. Hadn't tried in a week or so, figured what the hell?

So the plan: it's $5 lap dance night at Cheetah's, and then there's Bobbarubas. Bobbaruba's is a nearby over/under dance club that's kinda cool, and only really open on Tuesday nights. Sarah's been known to be there, figured there was a good chance of maybe catching Xelena, also. I can't drink much, but no matter.

SUCCESS!...managed to park and get in to Cheetah's. As you might imagine, $5/dance night fills the place. As soon as I got in, found the last table, sat down, and in a rare bout of "niceness" I let this guy take the other chair. He turns out to be Broke Sketchy Loser, but at least he can watch my beer. Doesn't matter, because 30 seconds later Brianna comes by. We move to couches in the back.

WOW. She's a solid 4.5+. Perfect body, no tattoos, turns out she lives in Virginia and is here on vacation visiting family. Has a real job, using the club to pay for the vacation and Christmas. She also turns 21 at midnight. I get to buy her her first legal drink, and then her first legal shot. This is in between about $20 worth of "fun"...and damn, the girl's got skills. Decide about 0030 it's time to call the game. The pretext was easy, the fun part was watching her defenses crumble so quickly and easily to a textbook-offense:

Me: We should take you out on a bar crawl now that you're legal, it'll be fun. Surrender your digits!
Her: But I'm only in town until Christmas, have family/friends/blah...
Me: Cutting her off, 'Doesn't matter, I'm moving soon also. We might as well have some fun now.' This is a nice piece of verbal ju-jitsu, as now not only is her argument cancelled, but there is implied the added future-possibility of me being flexible to relocate.
Her: Well...that does sound like fun, and there are movies I want to see but won't go alone...
Me: Good choices, me too, lets go. She's unlocking her own doors now.
Her: But you need to know I have a long-term boyfriend, so don't expect anything, and have birthday stuff to do all Wednesday...
Me: 'Don't worry/whatever', as I completely ignore the boyfriend ploy, 'I've got plans Wed. too' And now for the coup de grace, 'That blonde waitress? That's my friend Megan, we hang out. Ask her, she'll tell you I'm not some pathetic loser.'
Her: She melts instantly, cutting me off, 'But Thursday or Friday would be great! Do you have card...etc.'

She threw open the door, and completely crumbled. Now let's see what sort of magic I can work on her in the real world ;). I don't usually do this, but since there's only about 2 weeks to play with, plan on giving her the Impressive Date. This could get out of hand in any of several ways...I get the feeling she's genuine, but something doesn't feel completely right about her cover story. Like that's ever stopped me before ;).

Tonight's Trouble: Attempting Erin, with a later visit to Xelena if she's working and her phone's not back on by then.


Blogger ERICA said...

is that all you care about getting laid? nice!

7:04 AM  
Blogger Rev. Lick said...

Of course not, read the blog title.

I also care about drinking!

8:04 AM  

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