Sunday, December 05, 2004

Random Observations Before Puking

  • Why the fuck would you bring a 4-year old to a bar? What were you thinking? In a dress like that, you're sure as hell aren't dating anyone in the band. Bad mother, bad!
  • Exactly how much of a pussy do you have to be to show up to a club dressed in a floral print shirt that is exactly the same as your girlfriend's dress? Do the world a favor and donate what's left of your balls to someone who will actually use them.
  • If you're a fat, ugly chick, don't even think that I will jeopardize my bar-space by letting you in to get a drink. BTW, that "Diet" rum & coke you ordered? Not helping. At least make it a "call" drink and act like you have some semblance of taste.

So, not much to speak of in the "adventure" department. Dropped by the Q-Pub and scored some points with Cynthia. At the 21 Club, I did run into Kristen, and running into her alone salvages the entire evening, which seemed doomed from the start due to a lack of Mojo. Kristen is a 4.5 minimum. I left at the appropriate time, strategy-wise. Also, to look for more prospects ;). I can always call Kristen later.

Here's the weird part. So, aside from tactics with Kristen, I left to check out a new bar downtown. It was overall dead, overpriced beers, but a good band. While checking it out, I passed the "last call" point of being able to go anywhere else. So I had another beer, and made extreme friends with the barmaid ;). Finally "broke the seal" somewhere around 0145. So, as we're getting kicked out, I go to the bathroom for a final stop. For no reason whatsover, I end up puking all over the place. As I'm about to take a piss, I end up puking in the urinal, then the floor, and finally in the toilet...repeatedly. Then I go back to take a piss, somebody else walks in, and I blame it all on someone else ;). Granted, I'd had a number of beers, but nothing puke-inducing. Maybe it was the attempt at testing "Chaser" again. I'd think about feeling bad, but this bar's fucked up management was charging $4.50 for a draft. This is more than the fucking strip clubs. Fuck yeah, they can clean up my mess after that!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man that's a great story! Did you puke all over the floor? And puking in the urinal -- great move. Some fuck has to clean that out... your chunky puke bits plus all the piss in there! Nice move!

And yes, that fuck deserves it. He shouldn't be working in a place that charges so much for beer!!!!

7:17 PM  

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