DISCLAIMER: For all of my "Anonymous" readers, or those (few) who don't personally know me: Don't take much of this seriously. Yes, this is my actual life, and actual experiences, and I do reserve the right to take an *extremely* small amount of storytelling-license in the reporting of said life, but you must understand that at this point I really don't take much or any of this shit seriously. It just doesn't affect me, although it might make for some interesting reading ;). Also, I'm not setting out to "hurt" anyone with my Final Dayz Rules, I just aim to have as much fun as humanly possible without doing anyone any extraneous damage :).
Not quite sure how to tell this one, other than that I set out with great ambitions, and on the whole, failed miserably. At least for now. But I did succeed in drinking a lot, so here goes:
1655 - Arrive home from base, and wasting most of my week in Nowhere, Mississippi.
1730- Make plans for Twong's Bachelor Party, in Montreal. This will rock!!!!!
1930- Awake from nap, order Double Daves, begin evening preparations.
1936- Call Gorgeous Erin, supposing she's at work. Sadly disappointed. Now, after a phenomenal first date, it has now been a month and a day, and we still haven't had Date #2. Granted, about 2.5 weeks of this was for each of us being out of town. There were also two failed attempts at drinks, etc., which largely fell through on her end. By Corpus Standards, she's actually OK because she at least answers the phone, or calls me back, and explains why after. However, I find out tonight that she's had an accidental fall, resulting in lots of tendon damage to ankle/knee. This is not good. Volunteered to help her with more moving tomorrow (Sat), but we'll see if I hear anything. Decide to make most of rest of evening, and return heavily to Search Mode as currently trying to date Erin really isn't going anywhere. This does actually really annoy me, as Erin has Serious Dating Potential.
1943- Try more phone calls, formulate Plan. Focus is on Generating Possibilities and Meeting Women.
2234- Finally leave house, after much delays, including making myself presentable. Stop at convenience store for cigs, cash, and Lottery Scratch-Off tickets*
2255- Arrive Q-Pub, to hopefully see Cynthia The Bartender. She's 35, blonde, fun to talk to, and has absolutely incredible breasts. We've talked of dinner as we have the same favorite restaurant. Unfortunately, she's not there. Have one beer(Shiner), move on. Take first two Chaser tablets. If you're unaware of this product, it's advertised in Walgreen's as being a hangover cure.
2313- Arrive at Pleasures Gentleman's Club. Reason for being here is that it's one of the better B-clubs in Corpus, and it's very near to where Sarah The Stripper lives. Or did, a couple of weeks ago. Here's the update on Sarah-last I called, yes the Lesbo-Bitch and gotten involved, Sarah had called CPS on one of the girls from her club the last time she was at work, and thus couldn't go back, and I was supposed to take her along with me over Thanksgiving and drop her in San Antonio or Austin. Couldn't reach her for the pickup, left without her. No other choice. No news since then, and she hasn't been at any clubs that I know of. Since Pleasures is basically walking distance from her last known residence, and I couldn't get any info from a phone call, I went there. My mission was to find out about Sarah, and hopefully avoid Blondie. Well, as it tunrs out I ended up using Blondie to really find out if Sarah had been there, which was a "no". I was hoping to do this easily and cheaply, but no way. This ends up involving 2 Shiners, tequila, and two more shots. Here's the deal on Blondie-she gives about the best damn lapdances I've ever had, which pretty much includes a hand job in there. Her breasts are real, large, and she likes to use them. Overall, in terms of having fun "inside" a club like this, she's A++. I haven't been back due to 1) inability to convert to anything *outside* the club, and 2) it's really, really, freakin' expensive. But she's also a great source of information while I'm fondling her, and offering a "real" birthday party ;). No Sarah, time to move on.
0021- As it happens, Sarah's last known address is about 6 blocks from Pleasures. I do a drive-by. No real info gained. Thought about feeling stupid/pathetic for being a "stalker", except that it's Final Dayz Rules and I really don't give a shit. Time is precious now.
0023- Realize that Sarah may be living no more than 3 blocks from my church. Interesting, yet twisted.
0026- Arrive at Irish bar. Drink one Guinness. Unfortunately, no women available, though I do give my card to one of the old barmaids who's hanging out there. Text message a couple of hotties for attempted rendezvous. Response: I'm sleeping. Damn. I am now an hour and a half, and about $50 behind schedule.
0052-Decide that Search Mode is out for the night, as there's not enough time left in the evening to work any of the clubs.
0057-Arrive Havana Club, no possibilities, don't even bother ordering a beer, walk out.
0103-Arrive Mulligan's, drink one Shiner Hefe-Weizen.
0107-Realize that nothing's going to be happening for me in the real bars tonight.
0113-Depart downtown, aborting the primary mission.
0137-Arrive Cheetah's. This is the #2 strip club in town, which also has the advantages of having cheaper drinks and being more laid-back than #1. It's also all of 6 blocks from my house. Get in free, only bonus of the evening. Drink 3 more Shiners before last call. Came here in attempt to see Lisa, who had talked about moving from dancing to waitressing. That seems to have lasted at most 3 days.
0215-No love for me. Have to keep brushing off girls I'm not interested in, the ones I wanted to see are all busy, and I'm becoming a bit less polite. This wouldn't normally be a problem, but the last 3 Shiners were not a good idea after all. I notice that there is no breakfast buffet. Then I realize that the club is no longer staying open until 3am on the weekends. This is not good.
0245-Arrive home, drink last Shiner in the fridge, and make Captain 'n Coke. Take two more Chaser tabs, am now at approximately 2/3 the recommended dosage.
0307-Send text message to ex-g/f Crystal. The story behind that one is worthy of a post sometime this week. At least it's better than drunk dialing. Return to gambling.
0330- Realize I am far too drunk to continue blogging, pass out.
NOW: Chaser results, not bad. Not sure what my BAC was by 1047am, but after 1/4 cup of coffee, I felt just fine. Cautiously endorsing this product. We'll see how it stacks up later for some mid-week testing. No pain or fatigue, but general post-drinking night "fuzziness" still present.
Time to get cracking on my Internet Garage Sale, and to find out if my "company", Stella, is still going to make it up tomorrow. Much housecleaning needed.
*Yes, I fully realize and agree that playing the Lottery is a voluntary tax on people with poor math skills. However, it 1) satisfies my gambling lust, 2) gives me something to do while drinking at home after a night out, 3) obviates Drunk Dialing, and 4) always gives me a chance to "get lucky". Figure it this way: I buy a lap dance worth of scratch-offs (instead of a lap dance), and usually get at least some, or most of my money back, which I use to continue playing for several more iterations. It's not quite as erotic, but it keeps me out of too much trouble. I really don't care to do away with any of my vices, this is just about "optimizing" them :).